Comments on: THE Reason Why Marriages Struggle http://www.cloften.com/?p=1994 He'd rather be funny than good! Fri, 29 Jan 2016 20:05:26 -0600 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.6 hourly 1 By: Mandy http://www.cloften.com/?p=1994&cpage=1#comment-1272 Mandy Thu, 24 Sep 2015 03:21:23 +0000 http://www.cloften.com/?p=1994#comment-1272 As someone who is recently divorced, I want to say I agree with this 100% and that is hard to admit because it means taking blame on myself too. I hope that at least one person reads this post and changes something they are doing or not doing. Marriage is hard but divorce is excruciating (or it is for me.) I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I do want to add that it is crucial that both husband and wife are doing what they need to be doing - at the same time (all the time) preferably. In my opinion, when only one is doing what they need to be doing, it can lead to the "presenting problems" that you outline and resentment/bitterness. Even if it switches back and forth between who is doing the right thing, that doesn't offer the picture of what marriage is supposed to look like - it has to be both doing what should be done in the relationship. Thanks for this post - even if it is hard to read at this point in my life. As someone who is recently divorced, I want to say I agree with this 100% and that is hard to admit because it means taking blame on myself too. I hope that at least one person reads this post and changes something they are doing or not doing. Marriage is hard but divorce is excruciating (or it is for me.) I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

I do want to add that it is crucial that both husband and wife are doing what they need to be doing – at the same time (all the time) preferably. In my opinion, when only one is doing what they need to be doing, it can lead to the “presenting problems” that you outline and resentment/bitterness. Even if it switches back and forth between who is doing the right thing, that doesn’t offer the picture of what marriage is supposed to look like – it has to be both doing what should be done in the relationship.

Thanks for this post – even if it is hard to read at this point in my life.

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