Green Lantern Movie Review

I did something that some people do not understand but sometimes I find to be necessary.  I went to see a movie by myself the other day.  The girls were at camp and mom was busy and so I took a couple of hours and just unplugged and watched the Green Lantern.  First, did you know the cheap movie theater in Fayetteville has a 3-D theater now? Did you know it was small and depressing? Did you know that makes it not cheap anymore, even if you get there super-early?  Did you know they let you keep the glasses?  What does it mean?

Green Lantern stars Deadpool in the lead role (I don’t like one superhero also being in another superhero movie.  It doesn’t seem right.  I’m looking at you Captain America/Human Torch and more obscurely Cyclops/Lois Lane’s new boyfriend or husband or whoever you were.) It also stars the Gossip Girl (never seen it) as the stereotypical wet-blanket female lead, the bad guy from Robin Hood and Sherlock Holmes as the foreshadowingly named Sinestro (That is not a spoiler. He is good throughout the movie, but come on, Sinestro? You could’ve figured that out.  Also, you should know that if you have any familiarity with the comics.), and I swear I know him, no I don’t, wait he was in Knight and Day as the bad guy.  It also features a couple of “Really it’s come to this” appearances by Tina Turner (the one who played her) and Andy Dufresne.

Expectations: Very low.  The previews didn’t look that good.  A fellow superhero movie lover said he didn’t like it.  “Then why did you go see it?”  Duh, it’s a superhero movie.  Clearly, you are new here.

Reality: It actually was pretty good.  Maybe that is just the expectations were so low that it had to be better, but I enjoyed it.  Better than Thor worse than X-Men First Class.  It certainly is not an elite superhero movie, read Iron Man, The Dark Knight, but it was good.  The story was good, the acting was good, the wet blanket female lead wasn’t wet blankety at all.  I think the directors are starting to figure this out.  Thor and Iron Man were both good, X-Men doesn’t even have them.  With the exception of Rachel Dawes (both movies) there hasn’t been much wet blanketyness.  (If you don’t know what this means, you don’t watch many superhero or sports movies.  Watch the Michael Keaton Batman and observe Vicky Vale or Hoosiers and that teacher.  Add nothing, discourage the hero, take away from the action.) I think the reason it (and Thor) did not do well is that I think we love sci-fi movies and we love superhero movies.  When they are both, it’s just ok.

Appropriateness: An abundant supply of wirty dords and some implied sex-having (What? He wakes up and there is a bare-shouldered woman in his bed.)  The violence is very sci-fi-ish and not troubling.  I would put it very low on the appropriate for kids.  PG-13 for a reason.

Rating: (Back to the old system)

See it in the theater and will definitely own

See it in the theater and might own

See it in the theater and will likely rent it

See it in the theater and be done

See it at the dollar theater

Rent it

Avoid it.

I rate it a see it in the theater and be done. (There is a small chance that I would by it.  If I were strolling around in a Best Buy this fall and the Blu-Ray were 9.99 or less, I probably would get it.)