Why Do You Like American Idol?

January 20, 2010 by cloften  
Filed under General Insanity, Silliness and Rants

I believe that by now that all people who follow American Idol and many who don’t have seen the incredible Pants on the Ground audition.  If not, here you go:

Something happened in the aftermath of this that surprised me.  Some friends of mine that are big American Idol fans of mine didn’t really like it.  These friends are the hosts of my favorite morning radio show, The Morning Rush on B98.5.  I was stunned.  How can fans of Idol not just love the General?

Then it hit me.  Some people love American Idol: the Singing Competition.  My family and I, on the other hand, love American Idol the Trainwreck of Craziness that Becomes a Singing Competition.  We love the craziness at the beginning, the people who can’t sing but don’t know it and even the people who dress like idiots, know they can’t sing and are just looking for attention.  Then when it turns into a singing competition, we pick someone to root for and follow them all the way.

If there is any part we don’t like, it’s Hollywood week.  It’s contrived drama.  They take crazy melodramatic artists, keep them up all night, pair them with other crazies and then they cry.  No thanks.  Either give me the bad singers or let’s get on with it.

How about you? Singing competition? Trainwreck of bad singers? Contrived drama and crying?  What do you like about Idol?

American Idol, Chicago Auditions

Here is a stream of consciousness collection of tweets/posts from Tuesday January 19th.

Seriously, you get an opportunity to be on national TV and you drop f-bombs and give the finger. Stay classy, America.

In an effort to keep up with Jillian and Biggest Loser, Simon starts offering family therapy.

Team Over the Top Broadway Seacrest stalker/Pass out on the floor, even that was too much for me and I love the crazy people

TEAM FELLOWSHIP, TEAM CHARITY VANCE. Text vote to some number right now for practice.

I don’t think they gave crazy accordion lady a chance. I think she should go far.

Team Angela Auditions a lot/Traffic Violation. Lauren: I bet she has quite a collection of those golden tickets.

Despite my (occasional) quippiness, it really does hurt when the people who think they can sing get laughed out of the room. (See Team Big Guy in White Outfit who screeched like an owl)

Team Tiny Tim/I sing for the troops/Subsitute Teacher. I vote joke. What do you think? (His walkaway, made it obvious)

BTW, if I can talk Adam Hambrick into auditioning next summer, I’m going with him. Anyone got any ideas for what my audition schtick could be?

White hat, Rocky theme music. No way they are setting us up for a ridiculous audition. . .What? I’m shocked. Hey, it was his allergies. Wait, again. Is he really crying? Knot in the stomach now.

Team Inappropriate Banter with Shania: Didn’t think it was that good. I think he got in because everyone else was so bad.

Girlified, is that what you call when the women in your life overwhelm you, guilt you and make you change your mind about something? If so, I have been girlified many, many times.

American Idol Day 1

Here are some thoughts on Day 1 of American Idol.  I will try to keep these brief, because unlike my Facebook postings, I need to start slow.  4+ months of diligent following of American Idol is a marathon, not a sprint.

Some general thoughts:  did anyone miss Paula?  Honestly, I didn’t really notice that she was gone.  The only point in which there was a “where’s Paula?” moment was when the girl who was counting on success from her success at the AI video game kept pointing at Kara and calling her Paula.

Along the same lines, the Victoria Beckham sure did add a lot to the show, didn’t she?  She sat there and listened and sat there and listened.  Then on day 2, she sat there and listened.  I thought it was very strong.

There were three compelling (?) stories that they used to make us want to like certain contestants.  There was Team Sister of Four Brothers with Downs–loved the story a lot.  I have a soft spot in my heart for kids with Downs (like my niece).  She was a good, not great singer, but she is my early favorite.  Team Portuguese Girl with the Sweet Grandma with Alzheimer’s.  She might have been the better singer, but the Team Sister still gets the edge for better story.  Third was Team Hunky Cancer Survivor.  I got nothing to say, not a big fan of the Hunks they foist on us.

The 2nd tier of “compelling” stories weren’t that impressive to me.  Team Italian Guy with Family, Team Africa, and Team My Parents Were Too Strict.  They were just aiiiight for me Dawg.

The great debate continued, with Heidi believing that no one was putting on to get on TV with me thinking that most of them were.

The biggest laugh out loud was the guy that they made us believe was a New Age Hippie who wanted to touch the world.  My guess is that he wasn’t what they made him out to be, but it made for great TV.  The part where he reaches down and smells the flower and the wind blowing through his hair was hilarious.  Then his singing brought it home.

Resisting my urge to say everything, I will end with this.  My favorite line of the night is when Kara said that Team Africa needed Star Power.  What is this Guitar Hero?

It’s going to be a great season.

American Idol Day 2 Posts that I didn’t make because I didn’t watch it live

January 13, 2010 by cloften  
Filed under General Insanity, Silliness and Rants

If you watch the show enough, you know that you are being set up with Team My Uncle Was One of the Pips. (But he did have great range, if you redefine both of the words great and range.  Sing it with me, “Laaa-teee I looooow you.”)

Did Mary J Blige say that girl won Miss Congealiality?  Does that involve making Jello the best? (She was not that good.  Loud singing is not the same as good singing.)

I don’t like it when they just popcorn the good singers.  Either give me the backstory or just show me the bad singers.

Randy just say “yes” or “100% yes” Please the mathematician can no longer take 1 million 400 73,000%. Whatever that is.

Your assignment tomorrow is to go around saying “411 the show” and then do that annoying hand thing. (Of course, she did an over the top version of Pat Benatar.  Of course she did. Performances like this is why we love the first couple of weeks.  And of course the over the top exit.)

Producers meeting: “Hey guys, we don’t have enough contrived drama.”  “Hey, I know let’s add an elevator, like on the decision day show.”

Hmmm, I wonder if Ellie May the bridge jumper will be good?  Is this the producers’ revenge for an Arkansan winning last year? (I liked it.  They set me up and I fell for it.  Pleasant surprise.  How many times in his life do you think Ryan has heard the phrase, “I don’t have butterflies, I have frogs?” or the word Air-o-plane?)

Add in Team I Almost Died Three Times and the producers are definitely taking shots at the South.  Careful, there is another Arkansan in this year.  We might rally again, just to show you.

Team I’m Dressed Like a Guitar:  I will leave the commentary on this to people without filters.  I, on the other hand, must remain silent. (Usually they don’t let the gimmicks in, even if they can sing)

Team Low Cut White Dress.  Simon always puts this type through, but they never last.  It’s quite annoying, just send them back home.

Put me down for 1000 votes for Team Skii Bo Ski.  He is my kind of ridiculous. (I am also like a Dollar Store, in case you were wondering)

Team BFF’s for Life.  Isn’t that redundant?

Team Small Town Cop: Was he from Winchestertonfieldville the town from Mr. Deeds?  Heidi wants to know if they can do something with that hair. . . soon.

Team Mary J. Blige Stalker, taking crazy to a whole nother level. (It’s never good when the security guards and the f-bombs come out. The sarcastic clappers at the end were a nice touch)

Team General Pants on the Ground. That may be the BEST, IDOL, MOMENT, EVER. (Pants on the ground, pants on the ground. Lookin like a fool wit yer pants on the ground)

Questions to ponder as we get ready for American Idol

January 7, 2010 by cloften  
Filed under General Insanity, Silliness and Rants

We are getting ready for Season 9.  (Wow, season 9).  As we get ready here are some things we need to be thinking about:

1) Will we miss Paula Abdul?

Of course, she was fun to make fun of.  People enjoyed speculating as to if and why she seemed, well “off” on certain nights.  Her banter with Simon was at some points fun and some points contrived and annoying.  I wouldn’t say she added anything in the insightful commentary arena, so we’ll see if we miss her.

2) Will Ellen DeGeneres be a positive addition?

There is no doubt that she is funny.  There was a time when everything was political with her and she stopped being fun.  We seemed to have moved past that.  Will she try too hard in the commentary?  Will she not want to be funny but “helpful” and lose who she is?  Will she just be funny and be somewhat pointless?  Can she find a good balance?  I’m optimistic.

3) Will Idol make any subtle or not so subtle rule changes to make sure their favorite wins?

The overwhelming support from a small area (here in Arkansas) took Kris Allen to a huge victory.  Any fans of the show would know that the producers and judges were not happy about this.  What will they do, if anything, to try and prevent that?  Will they relentlessly shove someone(s) down our throat?  Will they make sure that someone with local appeal and charm never gets to be voted on?  Or is there no conspiracy at all and Idol just loves cashing checks and they don’t care who wins?

4) (ongoing debate question)  What percentage of the bad singers know they are bad singers and just want to get on TV?

I think most do know.  Heidi says most do not.  We will be discussing this here in detail over the first couple of weeks.  Clearly, the ones who dress up are just trying to get on TV.  What about the rest?

5) Is it possible that without the local rooting interest that Cloften will still be as “into Idol” as he was last year?

I can answer this for you.  Yes.  We were into Idol all the way back to the Clay/Reuben debate back in 2003.  We were major Rueben supporters.  Last year was not new for us/me.  It was just the first time I had such a public forum to expose it.  For those of you who don’t know what I’m talking about, just wait.  Follow me on Twitter or FB and sit back and watch.



6) Will Simon be “mailing it in” this year?  If he is really out, does he even care any more?  He gets paid the same 36 million if it’s successful or not. He doesn’t care about next year.  If he does mail it in, wouldn’t that make him meaner and care less and therefore even more funny?  Is it possible that X Factor could be bigger than Idol in 3 years? Is all of this a gimmick like the first seven Brett Favre retirements?  Are they just generating more hype for the most hyped show in television history?  I’m going with the publicity/conspiracy theory.