That’s not fair

Have you ever noticed how much time we spend lamenting things that we have deemed are not “fair”?  Why did he get that job?  Why does my brother get to stay up later than me?  Why do they have more money?  Why did this bad thing happen to me?  Why are these people getting away with hurting me?  “IT’S NOT FAIR!”

I say all of this even as I sit here with a small knot in my stomach myself about something that I wish were different, that will, no matter what, not ever be different.

What an incredible waste of energy it is for us to spend so much time dwelling on what we deem to be not fair.  Why did this happen?  Who let this happen?  Here is what should have happened.  We go on and on.  We lose sleep.  We rant to our friends.  We even get theological and bring God into the situation.  Did God cause this or did he let it happen?  Could he have stopped this?  Why didn’t God stop this?

We are not making the situation better.  We are not helping ourselves or hurting the people that cause us pain. (Though I have found that passive/agressive sulking really does stick it to people).  What then should we do?  First, surrender to the reality that life is not fair.  In John 16:33, Jesus assured us that in this world we would have trouble.  Why then the surprise?  Then we should turn from despair and frustration and turn to hope.  In Romans 5, Paul encourages to rejoice in sufferings (weird, I know), because they lead us to a hope in God’s love that never disappoints.  Everything else can disappoint us, but that hope never will.  Move away from your pain and frustration and turn to the love that God gives. 

I could spend a lot of time frustrated that I’m not 6′6″ and my basketball career was cut short, but I wouldn’t call that productive or helpful.  What is productive and helpful is learning to trust and lean on a God that loves us, especially when life is not fair.


One Response to “That’s not fair”
  1. Carolyn Loften says:

    Your comments really takes the fun of situations for those of us who really like to “goodness” (new meaning) – stand in the middle of the room, whirling around saying goodness, goodness -because something has happened and we can’t do anything about it.

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